Posted in Journal, Life, Love, cats, rape, suicide, the medical profession, tagged adventure, aging, arrest, bag ladies, bar, bathroom, can't hear, can't see, can't walk, caricature of myself, cats, choking me, college, confrontation, Crazy Cat Lady, crone, damaged, evil, freezing, garden, hate, honorarium, horror, hospital, husband, Joni Mitchell, landlord, lay in bed and watch movies, loved, lover, managing editor, marginalized, missing teeth, missing The Brass Ring, n love, naked, not loved, nursing home, pain, people screaming "Bitch!", pharmacy, pills and beer, poetry, poverty, powerful, powerless, PTSD, rape, research institituion, running out the door, Solstice, suicide, suicide attempts, talented, unemployed, University, Valium, wanting to kill, wasted talent, young on 4 July, 2008 | No Comments »
16 June 2008
I know now why I cannot live. I know now why I cannot find a place in this world for me; there *is* no place in this world for me.
I am 52 years old. Half or more of my teeth are missing. I have no job. I am in [...]
Read Full Post »
Posted in Journal, Life, Love, US politics, rape, suicide, tagged assassinations, Barack Obama, Bobby Kennedy, Dr. King, dream world, dreams, hope, lover, music, mutilated, passion, quasi-rape, sex, sexuality, suicide attempt, The Lady of Shalot, US politics, VIN surgery, violated on 4 April, 2008 | 2 Comments »
4 April 2008
It is Friday afternoon, April 4, and I am thinking about that shot ringing out in the Memphis sky.
I may be white, but somehow, many of my heroes are black. And Dr. King is certainly one of them. The vision, the dreams, the words, the courage – he had them all. [...]
Read Full Post »
Posted in Journal, Life, rape, suicide, the medical profession, tagged converter boxes, depression, garden, gynecologist, HEAP, landlord, making phone calls, mutilation, oncologist, ovarian cyst, Pap test, patient dumping, rape, rent, second opinion, Social Security, spring, suicide, surgery, the medical profession, utility bills, vulva, waiting on 30 March, 2008 | No Comments »
30 March 2008
It seems like all I am doing lately is waiting. It’s like the world has slowed and stopped, and nothing is moving forward. I am waiting, but what am I waiting for?
When I was a teenager, I wrote a short poem that said something about waiting for spring, for life and [...]
Read Full Post »
Posted in Journal, Life, rape, suicide, the medical profession, tagged bitterness, burglaries, cancer support chat, COPD, cruelty, gynecologist, insurance, Internet, osteoporosis, poverty, precancerous, rape, rheumatologist, suicidal thoughts, the medical profession, VIN on 11 March, 2008 | 1 Comment »
11 March 2008
Is it any wonder that I fail to trust in the good things happening to me, when each time a tiny tendril of goodness peeks out from the shade, it is brutally crushed by some cruel bastard’s big boot?
My friend comes to visit, I find out I have friends on the Internet, all [...]
Read Full Post »
